Very Much Potential Wife
by Awesome Anonymous
Summary: Story for LoVe Is OnLy An IlLuSiOn, who wanted something like Master's Pet \\ShikaHina\\ Shikamaru wants nothing but the perfect life: Wife, dog, kids. Yet he's turning 27, and still has nothing. So he "conjures" up a little plan //Rated T for abduction//
1. Desperation

Hmm, I think I did a good job. So here you are _LoVe Is OnLy An IlLuSiOn_, and I hope you like it. I really do. I had two ideas: it was either this comedy with Shika or the angst with Sasuke. I chose this one because I'm...happy? Well. that was a total lie. WAIT! I am happy, that just wasn't the reason I didn't do it. But if someone wants that one, just ask me.

Here we go again! Man, I love that song...you know, by Paramore.

* * *

Magic: the act of producing illusions as entertainment. Seriously, that came straight from the dictionary. Magic words, tarot cards, one of those crazy looking circles cults use to conjure up a demon, also called a magic circle. All this, even those symbols you might get tattooed on your ass when you're drunk as hell, is magic. Some magic, like with those circles, is all about supernatural. Otherwise, it's all an illusion. And you all know what that is right? You all know what the difference the word illusion has from delusion and hallucination, right? Of course you guys do! So since you do, you also know this: it's a wonderful thing…to some. You see, magic is against a lot of people's religion, but let's not get into that. Let's get interested into a person who finds all this interesting. He may be a lazy-ass bastard, who's not important to the world, at all. C'mon, he is only a simple business guy. He's the original: the office, the secretary, the co-workers. Just a plain-old guy who works for a somewhat big company. And since he has this SO interesting life, you all are going to take an interest in it.

Right now, he's sitting there, in a café, drinking coffee and reading a book. And you'll never guess what it's on. As he flips through the pages, he rereads every sentence twice. It was a stupid habit he picked up in high school when he wanted to memorize something. And, oh, he memorized it. So much he does it with everything he reads. And now here he is, reading his book that he picked up from the library last week, and doesn't care what anybody thinks. So what he reads about magic, it wasn't like he was going to do anything. His friends always joked, saying stuff like "You gonna put a spell on me!". Hell no he wasn't! He didn't believe in this stuff, not at all. The subject was just interesting. The one friend that joked about it the most was the one sitting to the left him at that little round table they let you use at cafés. He hated that. As he would say, they were so troublesome. He looked over, at the dumb blonde named Naruto. Man, did he thank God everyday that he wasn't his co-worker. Shikamaru, the guy you all just LOVE reading about, didn't like Naruto too much. Actually, he'd really like him at all. He caused so much trouble! Always disturbing Shikamaru when he was work, or getting them kicked out of a strip club that Shikamaru didn't want to go to at all but was forced because Naruto thought it'd be a good idea since it was the fool's last night of being single. Just plain trouble. And talk about being annoying! Shikamaru grimaced. Everything was always his fault. He didn't even know why the idiot was here, he didn't invite him. He just came. Shikamaru sighed out of depression; he always just comes. Now the redhead on the right of him, the serious, cold-hearted one, was kind of already here. See, Gaara always comes to the coffee shop on Sundays. Shikamaru guessed it was to get some work done.

Sadly enough, one thing irked the poor Nara. Oh, the poor, poor Nara. He was 26, turning 27. His friends next to him were 27. They both had beautiful wives and they both had a child coming on the way. You think this is all nice? Just all magical? WRONG! Not for Shikamaru it wasn't! He was turning 27 tomorrow and he still wasn't married. Now, you know that's some bullshit. How can a guy, who's been wishing for a perfect family all his life, not get one before the two he knew didn't care did. Bull! He had no girlfriend, no children, no dog! This was all he wanted!…Now you're probably wondering about the dog thing. You all have seen those perfect-family movies. The kind with the husband in a suit, the housewife, the two little boys that always got in trouble, and that one dog, most of the times a Lassie look-a-like. Well, all this crazy stuff, he wanted. So badly. But it just wasn't happening. And he was getting really desperate. You don't even know. You really don't. By now, he'd do anything, ANYTHING to get a wife, or at least a girlfriend that was going to become his wife. Just get this, and let it stick: HE—WAS—DEPERATE—AND—HE—WANTED—A—WIFE—NOW! Got it? Good. And also get that he didn't get his situation so much that he turned to Gaara and asked agitated, "How old am I?"; he needed a reality check.

Gaara stopped his typing on his laptop and slowly looked up. "You know." he said indifferently.

Shikamaru rolled his eyes and looked over, frowning from seeing Naruto shove one of those jumbo-sized cookies you buy at any café. Naruto looked at his lazy friend and started chewing like the Cookie Monster. "26." he said with his mouth full. He swallowed, with difficulty. "Turning 27." The frown on our favorite guy's face deepened when Naruto grinned. "By the way, what are you doing tomorrow?"

He sighed, going back to his book; he hated his life. "To work." he said lazily, even held back a yawn, and was totally prepared for what was going to happened next.

"What!!" Naruto shouted, and Shikamaru muttered a few words under his breath as everyone in the café turned all their attention to them. "Why would you do that!! Take off!!"

Shikamaru, as usual, ignored him; that was the plan. He sighed flipping another page. "I want a dog." he said out of the clear blue sky.

"Hey!! Did you hear me!!"

Gaara shrugged. "Then get one."

"Hey!!"

Through one ear and out the other. "There's no point."

Naruto hung his head; this always happened. And as usual, he lifted his head and asked out of pure boredom, "Why?"

He shrugged.

Gaara, with his whatever attitude, closed his laptop, got up, and LEFT. No goodbye, no nothing.

Another minute wasted, another page flipped, he was getting tired. He closed his book, but not before reading the title of the next chapter: mentalism. Ooh, what fun.

"Leaving?" Naruto asked and followed Shikamaru's actions by getting up as well.

He nodded, and explained because Naruto was somewhat of an interrogator. "I'm tired."

He nods, showing Shikamaru he understood, and both walked out of their favorite coffee shop: Konoha Café.

"See you later!" Naruto said happily before walking across the street.

Shikamaru spared him a simple wave and turned the other way. But he stopped and shook his head at the blonde's stupidity when he heard a car's brakes. He kept on walking; he knew Naruto didn't get hit, he never got hit. His friend always forgot that one simple rule: look both ways before crossing the street. Shikamaru mentally rolled his eyes; or he just could've followed the crossing signs. He quickened his pace. The faster he got home, the faster he could dream about the life he never had.

* * *

"Happy birthday Shikamaru!" the three co-workers yelled with joyous faces.

Shikamaru looked up from his computer and stared lazily at his three friends.

All their smiles stayed right in place. Waiting for a "Thank you guys!", but it never came. The smiles grew stale, but Hinata and Kiba's smile were still there, Ino's wasn't. She furrowed her brow. "Shikamaru!" she yelled, wanting her thank you.

He blinked twice then went back to his computer work. "What?"

She rolled her eyes and extended the small cupcake, with one lit candle, in her hand towards him. "C'mon!"

He stopped once again and gave her a stare saying "I don't think so".

"Argh!" she screamed and harshly placed the poor little cupcake on his desk, making the now sad pastry crumble into imperfectness. Kiba, his smile still present, watched Ino stomp out of the office. He let out a sigh and quickly picked up the cupcake, gave Hinata the candle, and devoured the little guy.

Chomp, chomp.

"Kiba!" Hinata pouted, watching her friend eat something that definitely wasn't his.

He swallowed the once perfect cupcake and turned to her. "What?" he asked, very confused. Then it hit him. "Oh! Sorry Hinata!" She gave him a small smile, saying it was alright, but it quickly dropped when he took the candle from her and grinned. "Man, you're lazy!"

She stared at him with half-lidded eyes then walked out the office as well. He threw his hands up in the air and followed her shouting, "What did I do?!"

Shikamaru stopped. He glanced up a few times before letting out a tired sigh and pulling out his now favorite book. He was on the chapter for mentalism. It was interest, more than all the others. He never really read about it before so he was reading the sentences more than twice. The book was talking about, basically, mind control. It said this: ask your subject any question you desire. What type of house do they live in. Do they have a job. Is that person interested in your interest. And most important, are they of homosexuality. He raised both eyebrows at the last sentence; he never thought about that. He quickly looked up when there was a knock on his door.

Hinata smiled at him. But before walking it, she gave her surroundings a quick check. She entered, swiftly, and gripped the plate in her hand tighter. "Happy birthday, Shikamaru." she said with a warm smile and handed him the plate of his favorite sweets: brownies.

He smiled a little as he took the plate from her, inwardly doing a cheer. He loved brownies! So much! Especially her brownies! They were always so chocolaty, and gooey, all that chocolate fudge oozing out. He could already taste it. He could already hear the crackling of the nuts in his mouth. He was going crazy just thinking about it. He wanted one now!

A weird smile appeared on Hinata's face when she saw how Shikamaru was eyeing the brownies she gave him. "You can have one, they are yours."

He snapped out of his trance, but didn't miss her words, so he quickly dived in for one. The plastic over them was now torn, and one was already missing, and another one, and another one, and another one. Shikamaru looked up with his fourth brownie in his mouth, and his fifth in his hand when Hinata started giggling. "Thanks." he said after swallowing, and knew what to say to make her stop laughing. "Why were you looking around like that before you came in? You looked paranoid."

And she stopped. He knew it would work. "Oh." she breathed out and glanced at the door. "I didn't want Kiba to get them. He kind of attacked me last year."

A small laugh left his lips. Kiba was such a scavenger. He watched her take a seat in front of his desk, the usual. She did this every year, and every now and then. For the past three years he has known her, she did this. She'd always bring in the brownies, then sit. Not saying nothing. But, he liked that about her. Because he was always reading, so she never disturbed him like anybody else would. Examples: Ino, Naruto, and many others.

Now that he thought about, he knows her, if you get his drift. Like really KNOWS her…not like that! Perverts! Like, he's hung out with her outside of work. She invites him to any gatherings her family may have and she needs to bring someone. No, they never talked on the phone, but they really knew a lot about each other. Yeah! Now that he thinks about it, he kind of likes her. No, he really likes her. It could even be love. He looked down at his book in thought, finally leaving the brownies alone: but what if she didn't like him? What if she had a boyfriend or something. No, she's never mentioned one, but he never asked. But they kind of flirted, so…this was getting him nowhere. Everyone flirts. He furrowed his eyebrows; but that wasn't really Hinata. She was sweet, kind, and probably flirting with someone else other than her boyfriend would be wrong. Perfect for him! But how would he go about asking her out? It'd probably be awkward. And he really didn't feel like going through all that waiting. First you had to date, then you went out, THEN you go through all these major problems, and at the end you either stay together or you don't. It wasn't simple, and he didn't feel like waiting. He sighed, but then, suddenly, he thought of something. He flipped back to the page with the questions before, and kept glancing from the book to Hinata.

She turned to him and blinked twice. "What?"

He cleared his throat. He couldn't believe he was really doing this. "Do you have a boyfriend?" he asked looking at the book; he didn't want to see how she reacted.

Her eyes opened wide; she was dumbfounded. "Wha…What?"

He looked at her, by accident, and asked again quickly, "Do you have a boyfriend?"

"Umm, no." she answered slowly, still wide-eyed.

He nodded. One question down.

"Uh, why?" She really was confused.

He shrugged nonchalantly. "Mm, survey." His eyes read another sentence. "Are you gay?"

* * *

"What do you want?" the guy behind the counter asked indifferently.

Shikamaru couldn't answer. He was too busy staring at this guy's many piercings along his face. They glowed in the dark. One was red, the other was green, and the other was blue, then it started all over again. It was…weird.

"Dude."

He snapped out of his gazed and breathed out a "huh".

"I asked what you wanted."

"Oh." Shikamaru said looking around the store. A very dark store. And it didn't bother him at all. The only thing that bothered him was that he was in a magic store.

See, told you he was desperate.

"Umm, chalk?" he said very unsure. Who would go to a magic store with a freak behind a counter when they could just go to one of those school stores?

"What kind?"

He cocked an eyebrow. "Uh, pink."

The guy stared at him, chewing the gum in his mouth like a cow, before he bent down and came back up with a pack of pink chalk. "Anything else?"

"Dogs…?"

"Like, what? Summoning, that mental stuff, umm, tarot ca—"

"Mental." He was starting to get the hang of this!

He turned around, looking through this old-looking shelf. "Mental right?"

"Yeah."

Five seconds later, he turned around and placed a dusty book on the counter. "That's it?"

Shikamaru nodded, and pulled out his wallet.

"300 bucks."

He stopped pulling out the 20 dollar-bill and slowly looked up at the weirdo. "What?"

"You heard me. This shit ain't cheat."

He bit his tongue and pulled out his checkbook.

He was really desperate.

* * *

"Bye Ino." Hinata said and waved to her friend as she walked back to her car in the big, lonely, dark parking lot. As she walked, all she heard was her own heels.

Step.

Hinata stopped and slowly looked around; that wasn't her heel. She quickly proceeded to her car.

Step, step.

She picked up the pace, but every time she did, the other footsteps would too. She was scared to death! She ran, taking out her keys to her car.

The steps got closer.

She was breathing heavily by the time she got to her small car. She looked from left to right but didn't see anything. And the footsteps stopped too. She exhaled and laughed it off. Calm down Hinata, she told herself with a smile, you're just being paranoid. Just like Shikamaru said. She calmly unlocked the car…BUT BEFORE SHE COULD EVEN OPEN THE DOOR, SHE FELT A ARM WRAP AROUND HER BODY!! SHE WAS FIGHTING, BUT HE, IT HAD TO BE A HE, WAS TOO STRONG!! HE COVERED HER MOUTH WITH A RAG and she felt herself drift off into unconsciousness.

Dun Dun Dunnnnnnnh!!

* * *

LOLZ!! I'm dumb! Aw, poor cupcake :(

So, yeah, seriously, I'm going to upload the next chapter in about a few minutes after I give it a quick revise like this one. I hope I didn't leave too many mistakes! I'm a little dazed out...-looks at the ceiling for no reason-

NO WAIT! It might even take longer than that. Because I'm getting lazy right now, sorry. I'll try...-looks outside a window-


	2. Master! Let's play!

"Are you sure you don't want to come hang out with us!" Naruto yelled over the other line. "We're at this club and—"

"I'm fine." Shikamaru answered lazily and was having quite the trouble opening the pack of chalk. "Damn, this thing is so troublesome."

"What? Coming to the club?"; he sounded so confused.

Shikamaru looked at the phone with a cocked eyebrow then let out a frustrated sigh. "Naruto, call me"—he glanced at the clock—"never."

"What! Why!!"

Click.

He didn't have time dealing with his _associate_, this pack-thing wouldn't open! He even started using his teeth. It was like those bags of peanuts on airplanes! It…just…wouldn't…OOOOOPPPPPPPEEEEEEEENNNNNNNN!!

Rip.

He blinked twice, and then shrugged taking out one piece of chalk. They were the big kind too. Like the kind people really don't use anymore but when you see one you're like "Yay, chalk!". Anyway, he got the chalk out, drew an almost perfect circle—that looked more like an almost perfect oval—with weird drawings in it that that were _suppose_ to look like doggy paws.

He never could draw, and he never cared to.

While he was checking the book, seeing if the circle was set up right and memorizing the stupid chants he had to say, he started to wonder what Hinata would be doing right now. She'd probably be watching TV. Her favorite program: Smallville. He looked that show too, every now and then. And if she weren't watching that, she'd be working. She was kind of a workaholic, and he really didn't like that. That was one problem about her, but he figured that he'd change that. She could even be taking a shower. Now, Shikamaru wasn't a pervert, but he thought he could think about his future wife in that way. Yes, his future wife. He had it all planned out already: she'd be his wife, he'd get a dog too, and they'd soon have children. It was just perfect. He slowly walked around the circle like it was sacred, still reading the book; he started rethinking this whole thing. It was truly insane, and he'd probably get locked up if he got caught. The police would think he was forming some cult. But he wasn't! All he wanted was a, if you could call it, a life. Yeah, a life. And the real kind. But, he still knew this idea was crazy. When he started thinking about kidnapping her, Hinata, he knew he had lost it. But it was only a thought, and he didn't want to become a psycho, so he didn't do it. He told himself that he refused to kidnap a friend. Then the next thing he knew, Hinata was past out in the back of his car.

Go figure.

He stopped reading the book and looked at her body, it was in the middle of his somewhat circle. He gulped, hard; he was so nervous. He reread the same chant over and over again. He read it so much, he memorized it already. So he was ready; he had his _subject_, he had the circle, and he knew the chant. The only thing that was missing was his usual courage. He still was second-guessing himself. He didn't know if—then it happened. As soon as this something happened, all that courage that he never had came rushing back.

She moved.

So now he wasn't scared, he was terrified! She couldn't wake up! That'd ruin everything! The whole chant was at least a minute long, but he was so nervous by now that it only took him a few seconds to say. All the words sounded slurred, it all sounded like gibberish, but he still went through it. And when the last weird magic word was said, he stared down at her with wide eyes. He couldn't believe he just did it! And he couldn't take it back; it was done. It was all over. And the more he stared at her, the more he furrowed his eyebrows…

NOTHING WAS HAPPENING!!

He could've swore he did everything the book said! He drew the circle, the stupid pictures, and he even kidnapped—caught a subject! His friend! His good, GOOD friend! That will probably never speak to him again if she finds herself in his house! She'll probably call the cops and she'll sue him for everything he's got! He knew this didn't sound like Hinata at all but he was too nervous to think straight!!

He couldn't take it anymore! He refused to get caught and be hated by his very much potential wife! He just refused! He quickly threw the book on the couch and careful picked her featherlike body up. Man, she was light! And her legs were so soft! Like silk! He didn't know why she had those pants on earlier!…yeah, earlier. He changed her into a pair of his boxers and a undershirt. But let's not get into that because we're trying to keep this story at least PG.

Anyway, he started to carefully walked towards the door, but stopped halfway there; he was wondering what he was going to do with her. He couldn't take her home, he had no way of getting into her house! And he couldn't leave her somewhere, she could get hurt! Rape! NO! Not his very much potential wife!! That wasn't happening! He could keep her there, at his house. He scoffed at the stupid thought; what would he say, "I saw someone kidnap you and I came to your rescue". That would be so cliché and unbelievable. And she'd probably ask why was he there so late when he left so early and he'd say something like "Oh, umm…I was bored". So dumb and cliché.

"Mmm." He heard her hum in pure delight. He froze; it was all over for him! He was a goner! They were going to lock him up and throw away the key! No, say it ain't so! He tensed up more when she turned over and his arms and gripped on to his shirt. She deeply inhaled and smiled. "Mmm, you smell good."

He cocked an eyebrow down at her; did she know it was him? He was confused as hell! But he did like how she, kind of, liked him. Or the way he smelled. He opened his ears up when she inhaled again, because he didn't want to miss anything, but got a little scared when she furrowed her brow. "You?" she said completely confused. Now he definitely knew he was in deep shit! Both eyebrows rose when she let out a giggle. "You. Mmm, master **you** smell good."

One eyebrow fell; master? Where did she get this master stuff from? He didn't get it—he mentally smacked himself. The book said something about that: _you want your subject to obey, just like a pet, so make sure that you are the first thing they see or smell after you cast the spell. If they see another person first, or smell anything else first, that will be their master_. Wow, he thought. He didn't know it would actually make her call him master. And wow, he couldn't believe this was happening. He…had…a…DOG!! He had a dog! And he had a wife! Kind of. No, yes he did because the book said…nothing. Shit. Oh well, he'd just cast a spell on her to make her love him! Yeah that was it!!

"Master?" she called politely with a smile.

He silently cleared his throat. "Yes, Hinata?"

Her smile grew. ''I want to play."

"Play?"; he was so confuzzled.

She quickly pushed him away from her, and fell out of his arms, but landed _perfectly_ on her feet, kneeling. She stared up at her master with playful eyes and smiled.

He looked at her weirdly for two main reasons: one, how did she land on he fee like that? Dogs don't do that! And two, why was she now rubbing up against him making this strangle humming sound. Like a purr…wait. He definitely didn't think dogs made that sound. What happened to the arf's and the whines?

"Master."

His eyes followed her slowly as she stood up. "Huh?" he breathed out in a daze.

She stood up, using her tippy-toes, and gave him big sad eyes. "I want to play." she said wrapping her arms around his neck.

CONFUSED!! That's all he was. She wasn't acting like a dog at all. She purred, she STOOD UP! He didn't know what was going on. She was suppose to act like a dog…but technically, she is still a human so that gives her the ability to stand. So that was one thing cleared. And for some reason, a meerkat came to mind. He still had a problem with the—"Hinata." he said with struggle, trying to keep himself from falling.

"Now." she complained, adding all the pressure she could to him.

"Hinata, stop." he said with more force almost falling on the ground. He paused. "Bad girl…?"

"I want to play now!" She totally ignored him. Just like a cat would do.

"HINATA!"

Thud!

* * *

A big smile was on her face. She felt so warm, but felt a small breeze against her legs. She tried rubbing her legs together, and furrowed her eyebrows when she didn't feel her pjs on her. But she smiled again when someone wrapped their arms around her tighter…

…

…

…

Her eyes shot open. SOMEONE! In her house! She looked around. This wasn't her house! Unless she redecorated without having any acknowledgement of it at all. That's crazy! She felt those arms tighten. Ew! Who was touching her! It could be a lunatic! He—she, whatever they were was a total lunatic! She didn't even remember anything that happened last night! Her eyes got bigger; did someone spike her coffee! Who does that!!…No. she remembered leaving her job, and remembered being scared to death…then…

SOMEONE KIDNAPPED HER!

She tried to look behind her; it was probably that guy! It had to be that guy! She looked down and saw she was in a pair of shorts and a tank top. She almost fainted. Did he rape her and try to play it off? OMG, she was having a BF!! She couldn't take it. She quickly pried the guy's arms from her and got up, tripping over something. She quickly turned to look at her feet and saw a ball. She glared; kinky bastard. She started to crawl away slowly then heard him groan. She crawled faster.

Shikamaru cracked his eyes open and cocked an eyebrow at Hinata on the floor. "Hinata?" he called exhausted, rubbing his eyes.

She paused. She knew that voice. Slowly turned her head, her eyes nearly popped out of her head. She quickly jumped up. "Shikamaru!"

His eyes opened wide too; he could tell she was about to run. "Hinata." he said in a calming voice and slowly lifted himself. "Just calm down—" He stopped and ran after her when she darted out of the room.

She started to run for the door but stopped in the kitchen. She stopped and looked at all the toys on his floor. The balls! This leash! She even stepped on this thing that squeak! He was sick! She swiftly turned around when he came into the kitchen. "Shikamaru!"

He sighed. "Please. Don't be so l—"

"Did you rape me!"

He frowned. "No!"

She looked around to see if she could run, but he had her cornered. "Did we do anything!"

He shrugged. "We played around for a few—" He stopped when he saw her more horrified expression. "Nothing like that."

She took a deep breath. She could…"What happened?" she asked looking around with slightly big eyes.

He shrugged again. "Nothing." he lied.

She stared at the floor in thought, then looked up with squinted eyes. "Were you the one who kidnapped me?"

Say the rescue thing, he scolded to himself, say the rescue thing! He sighed. "Yes."

She shook her head in disbelief. "Why?"

"I"—he sighed again—"like you." he said after a few seconds. She cocked an eyebrow. "I like you a lot. Like a whole lot."

"So you kidnapped me?" She looked around at the toys. "And treated me like a pet?"

He stared down in thought, then just nodded with another shrugged. That's all he could do.

She shook her head and turned around. She gripped the countertop. "Shikamaru." She paused. "You should know by now when you like somebody, you ask them out, or something." She turned to look at him. "You don't kidnap them."

He bit his lip; this didn't sound good. "But…" she said and he immediately looked up with hope in his eyes. She smiled at him. "I guess…it was kind of, umm, romantic…I guess. Because…" She looked away with a blush. "I like you too."

He inwardly had a party; he didn't have to cast another spell on her! He couldn't believe this worked! He had a…cat-dog, now almost a wife and children were on the way! Hip, hip hurray! Ooh, that rhymed! He smirked at her.

She laughed after awhile. "Just ask when you want something next time, okay?" she said and tried to walk pass him, but he stopped her. She blinked twice. "What?"

"Umm," he breathed out and shrugged with a smile. "Let's play."

She blinked again. "What do you mean?" She looked around at the toys on the floor. "With those toys?" She was just waiting for him to ask so she could say no; it wasn't happening.

But she got completely confused when he shook his head "no", and took her hand leading her to the bedroom. She absently followed.

* * *

Later, at nighttime…

"Hinata I'm sor—" Shikamaru stopped his 20th apology when he dodged the plate she threw at him. He gave the shattered glass on the floor a quick glance then started at Hinata with big, sorry, and SCARED eyes. He should've guessed this was going to happen! But, then again, who thinks straight after you turn a girl you like into a pet? Nobody. And since nobody would think that her, can you say "cat-version", would be PISSED the **freak** off after they _played_ a little differently this morning, he invited her over after work. Man, those WERE good times. They talked about things more than usual, and they joked and laughed. Good times…but now it's over. And he totally blames himself for not seeing the signs. He figured that she was a cat, more than a dog. Not a big deal. But now that he thinks about it, cats are more aggressive than dogs, in their own way. So when he saw her sit down uncomfortably, when she kept on biting her lip, or when he asked her what's wrong she glanced down and blushed, he should've told her to go home!...politely of course. Yes, he should've. But since he didn't, THIS WAS HAPPENING!

He opened his mouth to speak, but had to dodge another nice plate. "Hinata I'm sorry!" he screamed quickly, now ducking to avoid a cup that she gave him last year. He mentally sighed; he liked that cup.

She picked up another cup and threw it at her master. Her lovely master, who hurt her dearly and now had to pay. DEARLY!

Not another cup! This was beginning to be too much. He was losing a lot! He took cover behind his couch and his eyes got bigger when he saw a plate hit the wall. This had too stop. "Um, Hinata." he called sweetly. "Hinaaaaata." he called again and licked his lips before he started making that whispering sound that people use to call cats. He was praying that it worked.

Silence.

His heart was racing. If felt like she was going to kill him, which she was probably aiming for. He started to make the noise again but stopped when he looked up and saw her looking down at him with angry eyes. His heart started beating faster; she had a pan in her hand. "Hinata." he said staring at the wok. "Put that down…please." When her eyebrows furrowed more and she gripped the pan harder, he had to do something.

"Ahhh!" she screamed when he grabbed her wrist and pulled her to the floor. He quickly climbed on top her and pinned both her hands to the floor.

"Hina—" He stopped and jerked his head back when she let out a vicious hiss. He mentally shook it off and said, "Stop!"; this wasn't suppose to happen! She was suppose to treat him like her master! Stupid book, he thought out of rage.

She opened her mouth to let out another hiss but stopped when her master fiercely planted a kiss on her lips. A second later of holding on, he let go of her lips. She stared up at him and exhaled in defeat.

He smirked at her when he saw she calmed down. "Are you calm now?"

She looked away, then smiled. "Yes." she breathed out.

He let her go, and the smirk on his face dropped she lightly hit him with the pan on his head. He turned to her and his eyes went wide when she jumped on him with a smile.

"I love you Master!" she said joyously and started to place sweet kisses on his cheek.

He breathed out a lazy laugh and smiled. "Love you too, Hinata."

Fin.

* * *

Wow! Fun! And that's the end! What a lovely two-shot! Oohee! I really hoped you liked it _LoVe Is OnLy An IlLuSiOn_! I really really do XP

Haha, it got fluffy at the end because I was listening to this fluffy song -.-

But hey! Fluff is good! Yeah, esp. with ShikaHina XP

Meerkats? Their these possum-looking things that are NOT in the cat family, but kind of remind you of them. They stand up on their hind legs. Awesome huh?

And don't anyone of you all say cats are nice! Bull! I have a cat, and he's a jackass! i just called him while I was revising this and guess what he did?! NOTHING! He just glanced at me! Jerk! I called him to come to me not look at me!

Dogs at least come to you, my dog does :)


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